Dear Birthers: Here's your "long form" cert. Please STFU now http://tinyurl.com/3pd9ey9

Not that I expect this to satisfy any of those irrational morons who believed in the Birther conspiracy in the first place.

If catching cat vomit isn't good practice for parenthood, forget I wrote this.

It's easier than cleaning the floor and I figure I'll be catching worse
when I have kids. Or at least that's how I justify it.

In case I forget: Happy Homer Day!

Late one night on the couch. Homer can make himself comfortable in any gap.

Eating mango shave ice with adzuki and ice cream

Bluebells at Bull Run Regional Park

Impromptu pond at Bull Run Regional Park

Fox & Friends viewers be aware: That dude giving breast exams at Walgreens is not a doctor. http://tinyurl.com/4xwge2e

No matter what Steve Doocy says, the guy offering to check your pelvis at Walgreens is a pervert, not a doctor.

Tim Pawlenty: "I'm Running For President" #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement http://tinyurl.com/3w58thk

“[Tim Pawlenty’s] campaign said the ’I’m running for president’ comment was not an official announcement.” – With such daring statements followed by forceful retractions, I just don’t understand why people find T-Paw boring.

I may have a computer peripheral addiction

Or perhaps just a computer addiction. Either way, dual keyboard usage seems a bit excessive.

$15 gift card for only $70? Deal #FAIL

I know what they're trying to say (I think), but they didn't do it right.

Angry Birds on a Windows 7 tablet? No! Angry Birds on TWO Windows 7 tablets! http://tinyurl.com/3wlw6eg

That’s right. Dueling Angry Birds on Windows tablets on video only from Sumocat.